How to Win Friends and Influence People: Chapter 29

Reassurance is fundamental to building the confidence of your people. Confidence and competence are kind of a virtuous circle. Confidence boosts competence. And competence, in turn, boosts confidence. And it keeps going that way. When you emphasize people's mistakes, you discourage them. But when you praise the things they do right and minimize their errors, they're inspired to perform.

Confidence is no magic elixir that makes you do the impossible. But it lets you do everything better than you would have without it. And the best way to give someone confidence is through encouragement and making the fault seem easy to fix.

Another way to boost confidence is to track your progress. What's something that you've been battling with? What steps can you take to rectify it? Take those steps and measure your progress.

Tony Robbins offers the following four steps to improve at anything:

• Decide – Get clear on what you want and commit fully. No real change happens without a firm decision.

• Act – Take immediate and massive action. Progress comes from doing, not just thinking.

• Reflect – Measure your results. Look honestly at what’s working and what’s not.

• Adapt – Adjust your approach based on feedback. Stay flexible until you get the results you want.

In short: Decide what you want, take bold action,

evaluate your results, and keep improving your strategy.

Always have a goal that you want to achieve, and measure your progress towards those goals. Celebrate each minor success as you march towards the ultimate goal. Make progress easy and fun. And reward yourself for each accomplishment. Use encouragement. 

Make the fault seem easy to correct.